Across my face and into my soul.
Painful memories, flooding in,
Taking control of the fragile balance,
Tipping emotions towards the flood.
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| Streetlights through ice, © Nichola Jahn 2010 |
Such power, such monumental power,
Controls all that I can be.
I search for a moment of clarity,
Dreaming of days gone past,
Days when the blackness couldn't get in.
Seeking desperately to find the door
So I may close it tightly from the dark,
Become myself once more.
I look to the skies as though the answer is there
But reality bites back with the truth,
These demons that haunt my every being
Are a creation of my own.
Weapons are like nothing before,
Delving deep into subconscious prisons,
Mapping reactions, parent, adult, child,
Finding the moments that turn the tables,
Generating an arsenal against the beasts.
Fighting to survive against the darkness,
Fighting to keep on trying.
Victory barely a thought as the battle wages on,
Using up reserves just to continue,
But nothing the product of a troubled mind,
Should be allowed to win.
And with that thought I am inspired to go on.
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